Timing is Everything
by chocolatequeen
Summary: Post What If, Harm goes to talk to Mac


Title: Timing is Everything Author: Chocolatequeen Summary: This is... well, it's a HappyFic, but I wouldn't call it fluff... It's a good solid shippery fic in response to What If, how's that sound? :D  
  
"Why is there a bass drum in the office?" Mac mumbled. A moment later she woke up enough from her dream to realize she wasn't in the office and it wasn't a drum, it was someone knocking—pounding rather—on her door. "Ok, so why is someone here at 2:47 in the morning?" she wondered aloud as she wrapped her robe around her and went to answer the door.  
  
She was puzzled but not surprised when she looked through the peephole and saw the familiar figure of her partner, adversary, and best friend. Shaking her head slightly, she opened the door and asked, "Harm, what are you doing here at this time of night?"  
  
"Funny you should mention time Mac," he said enigmatically, closing the door behind him and leaning against it slightly.  
  
"And why is that?" she asked, staring at him in bemusement.  
  
"Because it's occurred to me that perhaps that's been our problem all along," he replied, his voice and expression leaving little question as to what he was talking about.  
  
Mac stared at him for a moment, her heart caught in her throat.I "Is this going where I think it is?"/I she wondered momentarily before she could stop herself.I "Sarah! Don't go there! Every time you do you just get disappointed again... of course he's talking about something else."/I  
  
She was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn't notice him push away from the door and approach her. "Mac?" he asked uncertainly, reaching out to touch her arm. "Are you still with me?"  
  
"I'm not going anywhere anytime soon," she said absently, not catching the glint in his eye when she mentioned time again. "So what exactly is this late night visit about?" she asked, avoiding his gaze.I "If he can't see my eyes, he won't see how much it hurts when this ends up just being..."/I  
  
"I finally figured it out," he announced, breaking her reverie.  
  
"Did you really?" she asked, her bland tone successfully concealing her racing heart. "And what exactly is it you've figured out?"  
  
A little of his confidence seeped away at her lack of enthusiasm, but he just straightened his shoulders and went in for the kill. "After eight years and three false starts, I think finally understand where we went wrong."  
  
"You're really doing this?" she asked incredulously. "I thought we decided we weren't going to have this conversation," she challenged, kicking herself as soon as the words left her mouth.  
  
"Don't Mac, don't apologize for saying that," he said when she opened her mouth again. "We didn't decide that, you did. I tabled it, and as such I can un-table it."  
  
"Is un-table a word?" she asked, giggling nervously.  
  
A grin spread across his face and he said, "It is now." Looking at her defensive posture, the smile disappeared and he added, "And I'd like to point out that you're not dressed to be going anywhere, so you can't say I'm only saying this because you have one foot out the door."  
  
"Harm," she said, her expression penitent, "I shouldn't have said that. I was just so frustrated; things just never seemed to work between us, we couldn't catch a single break."  
  
"Did you ever wonder why that was?" he interrupted, seeing the opening he needed.  
  
Stopped in the middle of a thought, her brow furrowed in confusion. "What?"  
  
"Did you ever wonder why things have never worked, despite those three aborted attempts?" he questioned, pressing his advantage. "Do you ever wonder what would have happened if Sydney had gone differently?"  
  
"No," she said quietly, wincing when she saw the disappointment flicker across his face. "I used to Harm, but I just can't let myself do that anymore..."  
  
"Well I can," he said, rallying his courage enough to continue. "For four years, I've kicked myself for what happened in Sydney Harbor, wondering how things might be different if I'd chosen the road not taken."  
  
"Your fortune was the same as the rest of ours," she realized, suddenly understanding where this was coming from, and understanding the odd answer he'd given her in the restaurant.  
  
"Apparently we all have the same secret wish," he said, a slight smile playing with the corners of his mouth. "Something occurred to me though; remember that old phrase, "Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it?" What if the road not taken is like that?"  
  
She had to blink fast to stop the sudden rush of tears from overflowing, but she couldn't quite keep the bitterness out of her voice. "If it's something we're better off without, then why are you even here Harm?"  
  
"Because Mac, it seems to me that it's the timing we've been wishing was different." He paused, waiting for some kind of sign of agreement before explaining the rest. When she nodded slowly, he said, "And maybe the fact is that no matter how much we've wanted this, or for how long, we truly weren't ready."  
  
"No Harm, I don't buy that," she argued, shaking her head vehemently. "If we weren't ready, then why have the feelings been there?"  
  
Hearing the frustration in her voice, he knew he had to work fast. "Mac, you know how I wasn't quite there this evening?" She shrugged, not sure where he was going and unhappy that he was avoiding her question. "I had a... well, I wouldn't call it a vision, not like what you get... more like a glimpse maybe, an idea of what could have been if Sydney had gone differently."  
  
When she looked up at him again, he breathed a sigh of relief.I "I might not have won the case yet, but at least the judge isn't kicking me out,"I he told himself. "Despite what we've both told ourselves for four years, I don't think we would have been happy." He stared at her, unsure how honest he could afford to be, but the vulnerable look on her face convinced him to tell all. "Mac, to be perfectly blunt, I wasn't ready for marriage back then."  
  
He saw her eyes widen in shock at his open admission of where their relationship would have gone, but he barreled on, knowing that if he even stopped for breath he'd lose his courage, and he might not get another chance at this again. "If we'd gotten married back then... well, it might not have ended badly but it sure would have been a rocky couple of years. And all those times we've tried since Sydney, I'm just guessing it's probably the same thing. We had growing and changing to do Mac, both of us. Isn't it possible that the time just wasn't right yet?" I "And the defense rests,"/I he thought, watching the deliberation going on in her mind. He waited for her to say something, but as the minutes dragged on, nervousness took root in the pit of his stomach. "Mac? Aren't you going to say something?" he finally asked, retreating to lean against the door again.  
  
"Don't you do that Harmon Rabb," she suddenly ordered. "Don't you come here and tell me that maybe the time wasn't right before, implying that maybe it's right now, and then back away. Get back over here... no wait, I'll come over there," she declared, taking a quick step across the space separating them so they were only a foot apart.  
  
"That's better," she said with a decisive nod. "Now, I'm willing to accept that perhaps we weren't ready before, and even that maybe we are now. What I'm not willing to accept is anymore talking about "being ready" without saying what for. Because until we're ready to say what we're ready for, we're not ready for anything."  
  
"Wow, that was a true masterpiece of rhetoric Mac," he said mirthfully, the nerves finally getting to him. "Ouch!" he hollered after she smacked his shoulder. "What was that for?"  
  
"That was for trying to make a joke out of something serious. I'll do it again if you don't answer the question," she threatened.  
  
"I have every intention of answering the question, just give me a moment okay? This isn't something I do everyday." He closed the gap between them and placed his hand lightly on her face. "I love you," he said quietly.  
  
The emotional force of those words sent all the air whooshing out of her lungs, and she let herself fall forward into his embrace. "I love you too," she whispered, completing the moment.  
  
~And in a small Chinese restaurant, an old man smiled. His fortunes had once again worked their magic, and two people had discovered that sometimes, timing is everything.~ 


End file.
